Family lawyers often meet clients when the clients are caught up in anger, hurt, and resentment. These clients are seeking a lawyer’s assistance to resolve the legal issues that have resulted from the breakdown of their relationship, but it can be difficult to help resolve these legal issues when a client is struggling with the emotional effects of their separation or the relationship itself.

Often we see parties’ emotions showing through in correspondence and court documents when they take positions or make arguments that have no foundation in law or fact. Litigating emotions in this way can be very costly and stressful. This is why the law in BC seeks to promote a conciliatory process to resolving family law disputes.

To assist a party with the emotional effects of separation, lawyers often refer them to counsellors who are equipped to help clients deal with their emotions and advise them on ways to communicate with the other party effectively. This support helps the party instruct their lawyer on the legal issues without being driven by their emotions.

Sometimes, as part of their emotional process, a party will apologize to the other party. Apologies have no legal implications because of the Apology Act of BC, and an apology can make a remarkable difference in the tone of the negotiations. When one party has the courage to acknowledge to the other that they caused hurt, it can break down emotional barriers and spearhead a constructive dialogue. We have seen apologies cause a complete shift in the climate of the dispute as the parties become willing to compromise and work together for the best interests of their family.

As lawyers in BC, we have a duty to encourage clients to compromise or settle disputes whenever it is reasonable and possible to do so. The lawyers at Jamal Law Group take this duty very seriously. We must discourage clients from commencing or continuing useless legal proceedings. When a client is determined to have their side of the story heard and vindicated, this can be very challenging; an apology can make the parties feel heard and relieve the desire to punish or “win.”

In the end, only the parties themselves can make the apology, and only they know whether they are ready to give or receive it. We share these observations because we have seen the power an apology can have in the context of a family law dispute. Apologizing is a simple act and can go a long way to healing the hurt, promoting the best interests of any children involved, and resolving the legal issues that arise from the breakdown of a relationship.

This article does not provide legal advice and the information should not be taken as such. For proper legal advice and current information about the law, you must speak to a lawyer.